Narcissists are usually active, friendly, and thrive on being noticed. They could have a network of admirers who surround them as the constant affirmation of themself is crucial to their self-confidence. They could also appear unfeeling and brutal, which reflects their inability to empathize with other people. Their inability to build healthy, fulfilling relationships is their insatiable desire to fuel their confidence levels.
Narcissists feel inadequate and depressed and constantly draw attention to their friends and family members to alleviate their feeling of being unworthy. Since they’re on they’re earned about their health, they often feel abandoned and unappreciated, but they keep trying to get the relationship to work. This pattern of repeated behavior is usually the hallmark of narcissistic personality disorder relationships.
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The Ups and Downs of Narcissistic Personality Disorder Relationships
People who are in a relationship with people who have a Narcissistic personality disorder do not know what they are doing. Narcissists cannot have feelings of love as do the majority of people. Every move and expression of emotion is designed to get the goal of feeding the ego of the narcissist.
They typically choose targets who are attractive and accomplished. Being associated with such an attractive person boosts their self-esteem, fueling their desire to feel valued and loved. They’re of They’reremely charismatic and use this attribute to connect to the people who are their most valuable. Although narcissists can appear very confident, they usually employ an exaggerated sense of self-worth and a belief in their worthiness to mask their insecurity.
Emotional Volatility, A Part of Narcissistic Personality Disorder Abuse
Narcissists can turn on a dime. This volatility can cause constant stress in a relationship. The narcissist must be constantly praised and admired. Who can meet any sign of criticism with fury or dismissal? This on-again, off-again feature of narcissistic personality disorder relationships can be the most challenging for partners. The lack of trust, empathy, cooperation, and concern can leave the partner feeling empty and abused. In addition, the partner may feel continually used by the narcissist, who is only concerned with their own needs and feelings.
The narcissist must always be the most critical person in the relationship. Even their children exist only to gratify their egos. They must constantly work to appear to know the most and have the most. When they feel challenged by someone, they may restore their dominance with condescending remarks. These qualities make it difficult for the family to know how to handle a narcissist on an ongoing basis.
First Stage – Over-Evaluation
The first stage of narcissistic personality disorder relationships features strong patterns of over-evaluation of the newly found partner. The narcissists train a laser-like focus on the target, praising the new partner to the stars and using their considerable charm and charisma to draw the target closer.
Their devotion will seem complete and unshakable. Narcissists draw their energy and self-worth from others, so showing off their new prize to others is an integral part of their self-gratification. Although they may be completely smitten with the partner, in reality, they cannot connect emotionally with anyone and only need the partner to achieve some other goal. Narcissists feel they deserve the best of everything, and they frequently use other people to achieve their material goals.
Second Stage – Devaluation
The narcissist narcissi can end as quickly and intensely as it began. The partner may be left wondering what they did wrong to cause such a fast and complete change. Narcissists are easily bored and are always looking for a new target to help them accomplish their personal goals. When they are finished with the current partner, they may go silent, be away from home frequently, not phone the partner, or otherwise make it evident that they are no longer interested.
To create distance, the narcissist may constantly demean or criticize the partner. Because they cannot connect emotionally, they may often dismiss their partner’s a sign of inadequacy. They may feel entitled to do whatever they wish and become angry with a partner that does not allow them to do so. These actions allow the narcissist to disconnect from the current partner so they can move on to the next conquest.
Third Stage – Discarding
The narcissist can begin the task of dissociating himself and herself from the bond. The break-up can be swift, complete, and damaging when narcissists have achieved their personal or material goals in the relationship and are prepared to move on to the next. They could begin their next romantic relationship even while being in the present one, believing that it’s theorists to choose what they please.
The other person with a narcissistic personality disordered relationship could feel unworthy and devoid of self-esteem, hoping that the other person ever really had any affection for them or if they’re not. The other party could be left in a worse financial position, socially secluded, and psychologically beaten.
Learning How To Deal With A Narcissist
If you realize you are in a narcissistic personality disorder relationship, you should first consider what made you choose such a person. Many people are attracted to the inflated self-confidence or tough-mindedness of a narcissist. Perhaps, one of your parents displayed narcissistic traits. In many cases, people are drawn to people who love the spotlight, never considering that this individual attention masks a deep inner void.
Maybe the sharp criticism and dismissal of the narcissist resonate with your internal self-criticism. Partners should think about why they are willing to be satisfied with a relationship where the other person cannot provide the reciprocated love they need.
Repairing Narcissistic Personality Disorder Relationships
It may be helpful to get counseling for the narcissist and the relationship as a whole. Narcissism can be an intrinsic part of a person’s personality and may require years of therapy to change these behaviors. The narcissist may or may not be willing to do this long, hard work to change. In some cases, medication for depression or anxiety can help the narcissist deal with the negative feelings that trigger their behavior.
Cognitive-behavioral therapy can be helpful for them to recognize the negative thought patterns and behaviors that make their lives so chaotic. Partners must also understand their part in the dysfunctional relationship and learn to stop feeding the narcissist’s own expense.
Getting Over A Narcissistic Personality Relationship
Unfortunately, narcissistic personality disorder in relationships can have such a destructive effect that counseling cannot overcome the inherent problems. The narcissist may even feel that they have no reason to change. These people may feel perfect, and the other person is so inferior that a relationship is no longer possible. The fact that they cannot rely on having their ego needs filled may cause them to leave.
Narcissists often leave the relationship for new targets who can fulfill their ego requirements without complaint. The person left behind may have significant emotional damage from the relationship. The narcissist may have imposed years of negative, condescending, or belittling behavior on the partner, which must be undone by careful self-assessment and forging relationships with more caring, emotionally-stable people.
Protecting Yourself Against the Narcissistic Partner
The partner must guard against the narcissist returning to gratify himself from the relationship further. These returns are a common phenomenon because narcissists always feel confident that others are proud and happy to be used by them. Finding ways to prevent being drawn back into the relationship can be challenging. Narcissists lack emotional connection with others, but they are highly skilled in “appearing” to be co “trite and loving.
The partner must clarify that no further interaction or entanglement will be permitted. Partners must continue working on their self-esteem to ensure that they do not fall into the same type of dysfunctional relationship in the future.