That deep ache of loneliness, pervasive and dark, seeps through your being at the most unfortunate of times. Friday evenings when you wish someone was by your side, Valentine’s Day when it seems everyone is out celebrating love with their partner, upcoming vacation time when the only person you have to travel with is yourself. What’s a solo soul to do?
A better question may be, what’s a solo guy or gal not to do? Here are seven ideas to fill your spirit by yourself and help you toss the word “loneliness” out of your life for good.
1. Find your “thang”, and take one step outside of your comfort zone.
What is the one thing in this life that makes your heart go pitter-patter at the thought of it? If it’s animals, setting up a weekly volunteering gig at a shelter will rock your universe. Do you love exercising? Consider joining cycling, rock climbing, salsa dancing, yoga or running group to engage in your favorite activity. If knitting is more of your thing, you can probably find one or two groups nearby.
2. Go inwards.
Loneliness is scary, but in truth, we are born alone and we pass through this world alone. The best way to squash loneliness is to meet your solitude head on, face it, feel it, make friends, allow it space, and it will pass. We often fear feelings that seem overwhelming and out of our control, but if we are able to allow the emotions to just be; they will diminish and seem less consuming. One way to do this is meditation. In psychology, the technique is considered mindfulness meditation. Even five minutes of meditation a day will make a huge difference as you come to know your inner energy and self.
3. Make a move.
The only constant changes, so any feelings of isolation or loneliness will pass—eventually. If you are desperate to make them pass sooner, a great method is to increase mood-boosting hormones such as dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins. In other words, move your body, sweat, exercise, and literally move the lonely energy out of the way.
4. Connect with nature.
Some people spend months or years in solitude and leave the experience feeling connected to everyone and everything. How is this possible? We were born of this earth and we are made of this earth (primarily water), so nature is one of the best places to finding happiness serenity, especially when alone. Often, when we explore nature with others we tend to see it through their eyes, rather than our own fresh, more curious vision. Nature can empower, inspire, enlighten, and awaken the body and the senses.
5. Dream a little (big) dream and create your vision.
The very best thing to do when moving through life as a solo being is to build the vision of your existence as you want it to be. The more solid you are in your vision, dreams, and desires, the more likely you are to attract positive, like-minded, supportive, and loving individuals into your field. Creating a vision board is a surefire way to kick-start your vision and help make it become a reality. Not to mention, taking the time to discover what you want most in this life—separate from family, friends, and partners—is one of the single most empowering activities you can do.
6. Spend time around others in comforting spaces.
Do you work alone? Or do you spend your weekends alone, mostly at home, recovering from your workweek? Why not try taking your work or chill time to a nearby café, library, or bookstore where you will be surrounded by the energy of others even if you don’t actively engage with them? Placing yourself in new spaces with new people may help change your perspective, your mood, and your energy. This is a go-to move for all single folk who are tired of spending time isolated at home.
7. Try travel as the ultimate loneliness crusher.
While it may feel scary at first, traveling is one of the most liberating and, at the same time, comforting ways for individuals to feel supported by the global community. While most people steer clear of traveling solo, some of the endless benefits include: feeling and following your own intuition, building your social skillset, stepping out of your comfort zone to talk to new people and learn others’ stories, meeting other solo travelers who may want travel partners, choosing when and where you wish to spend your time, doing whatever you darn well please, and feeling true freedom. Traveling alone is the ultimate way to rid yourself of loneliness.